Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Strange Vacation

Today's post is a little fun with fiction. As a Write Campaign participant, I get to visit lots of new blogs, meet new writers, and play around with some of the Campaign Challenges. In this challenge, we're supposed to write a 300-word scene about two people on a beach, with a bit of a twist. Here's my entry. Enjoy!



            Jen’s nose wrinkled as she sniffed the air. She eyed Eric, who slouched easily in the chair next to her. “How long are we staying here?”

            “We just got here.”

            She wrinkled her nose again. “I know, but…”

            Eric shaded his eyes as he looked east toward the low-hanging sun. Then he pointed toward the waves, breaking the emptiness of the cool air with their lazy susurration. “It’s beautiful. Enjoy it.”

            “But there’s so much to do.”

            “And we’ve got all day to do it. Relax.”

            Jen drummed her fingers on the armrest of her lounge chair. “How about I head back to the hotel and catch up with you later?”

            Eric gave a little hmph. “What are you going to do there that you can’t do here?”

            “Enjoy myself.” She wrinkled her nose again. “Besides, something seems a little off…”

            “It’s fine. Everything’s fine. And you’ll be fine too, if you just relax and enjoy yourself.”

            Jen straightened in her chair. “First of all, I will not be fine. And second of all, everything is not fine.” She inhaled deeply, then starting coughing. “Ugh. Eric you can’t tell me that you don’t smell…”

            “Jeez, Jen. I have everything under control, you know.”

            “I don’t see that you do.”

            Eric gestured for her to stop.

            “But…”

            “Shh.”

            “But…”

            “Shh.” With one finger raised in caution, Eric reached down toward the sand with his other hand, and slowly raised a book of matches. He lit it, whirled, and threw. Jen turned just in time to see the rotting zombie behind her fall to its knees, burning to oblivion.

            Eric turned around, slouching easily once again as he watched the waves. “I’m not letting zombies ruin my vacation.”

            Jen slumped, arms crossed. “We’re never going to get off the beach,” she muttered.

Copyright (c) 2011 by Michele Chiappetta. All rights reserved.

30 comments:

  1. Very funny ending. And a good scene with lots of good tension.

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  2. I think zombies would ruin my beach vacation! Funny!

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  3. Yay!! "I have everything under control." Love that. Great job!

    I'm entry #5

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  4. Zombies would ruin my fun too, but Eric is a determined guy. LOL. And Jess, thanks for pointing out a line you loved. I appreciate that. :)

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  5. Wow, you've def got me hooked, I want to read more! Good job! ; )

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  6. Haha! Zombie vacation. Loved it. Did not expect that at the end. Good job!

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  7. I like how Eric stays cool, calm & collected! What a guy :) Nice job!

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  8. Thanks, Sheri, KT and Alynza. Glad you stopped by to read!

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  9. Rarely have I seen "susurration" used. Perfect word choice! Awesome points for the zombie love! Great job! :)

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  10. Thanks, David. I threw "susurration" in to make up for not using the three made-up words that were part of the challenge. Also, love your blog. Good writing there too. :)

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  11. You surprised me :) Gotta love zombies on the beach! Thanks for the laugh.

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  12. Awesome story, it was really a surprise at the end. Good job.

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  13. I admire Eric's optimistic determination. Mine is #56

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  14. Angela, Mel, and Bridget... So nice to have all of you stop by and read the story. I'm visiting your blogs as I write this. :)

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  15. Great story! Very surprising twist at the end! :D

    I'm entry #69 :)

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  16. ha ha! love his confidence =)
    good job!

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  17. Ha! Zombies! I love the twist ending.
    Good job

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  18. Gotta love zombies on the beach! Awesome story, it was really a surprise at the end. Nice job.

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  19. Thanks, everyone! If I haven't stopped by your blog yet, I will. Promise! :)

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  20. Ha ha rotting zombies on your holiday! Very funny. Great job, voting now :)

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  21. Great! I love your characterization and the humorous twist! You're on the second round of voting. Good luck.

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  22. Great piece. I've moved you on to the second round of judging. :) Woot! Woot!

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  23. Ooh, that's awesome! Thank you, Rachel!

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  24. Hey I've come to let you know that you have made it to the final round of the Challenge and will definitely be winning a prize! Congrats!

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  25. Hi Michele, congratulations on making it to the final 12! I've now judged the entries, and you've come Fifth! Zombies, awesome twist - what more can I say :D Well done you!!!

    Don't forget to pop by Rach Writes... to see what you've won!

    Hugs,

    Rach

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  26. Thanks so much, Rach! I'm just amazed by this. :D

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